Consent - It’s Not Optional

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If you are in a relationship with another person and you think that you are ready to take things to the next level, there are a few steps you can take to ensure a pleasant experience for both you and your partner.

 

  1. Communicate with your partner. This seems like an easy first step, but many people struggle to talk with their partner about important changes in their relationship. When sex is involved, both parties need to discuss what they are comfortable with and what they may not be comfortable with.

  2. Always ask your partner before you initiate sexual contact. If they say “yes” to the contact, then they gave their consent and it is okay to move forward. If they answer with anything other than “yes”, do not ask them again and do not move forward with the sexual contact.

  3. Asking your partner multiple times for sex to pressure them after they say “no” the first time, is coercion. This is not consent because often the person saying no does not feel like they have a choice to say no after being harassed to say yes.

  4. If a person cannot say “yes” to a sexual act, you should assume they are saying “no”. A person cannot give consent if they cannot speak. This includes someone who is intoxicated or incapacitated.

  5. Acknowledge that you may be asked to stop and know that it is okay to ask to stop a sexual act after it has started.

  6. Practice safe sex by using protection during sexual acts. Condoms, lube, dental dams, and other safe sex supplies can be purchased from UHS Pharmacy as well as at many other pharmacies in the Ann Arbor area. If your student group would like to request free safe sex supplies, you can apply to Wolverine Wellnss here and will be contacted about when to pick up those supplies.

 

Remember to always make safe, informed decisions about your sexual health. In a healthy relationship, your partner will respect all your boundaries - especially your boundaries around sex. If you or someone you know has been harmed by past sexual relationships, Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) can help provide mental health support for individuals and couples. Additionally, if you or someone you know has experienced sexual assault, sexual harassment, or stalking, the University’s Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center can offer assistance.

Source: https://uhs.umich.edu/tags/sexual-health

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